Written by: Muskan Shah, Moitrayee Das
A study by Morgan Stanley predicted that around 45% of women between the ages of 25 to 44 were likely to be single by the year 2030. The reason for this is attributed to a growing preference to focus on personal and professional development, as well as the increased attractiveness of choosing to remain unmarried (Times of India, 2024). This represents a vast difference compared to older times, where getting married by one’s early to mid-20s was customary, and most women opted to have children earlier in life.
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The increased rate of singlehood among women may come as a shock to many. Growing up, society has consistently equated a woman’s worth to the kind of man she is associated with. A single woman is often considered unattractive and lonely, while a single man is put on a pedestal and considered more desirable. In late 2024, these stereotypes led to the research conducted by Elaine Hoan and Geoff MacDonald at the University of Toronto. In their paper titled “Sisters Are Doin’ It For Themselves”: Gender Differences in Singles’ Well-Being, the results found that single women are, on average, happier than single men.
About The Study
The study looked at a total of 5941 individuals, consisting almost equally of males and females, along with 29 nonbinary participants. The participants were between the ages of 18 to 75 (the mean age was 31.7 years) and had not been in a relationship for the three-year duration of data collection, which spanned from April 2020 to April 2023. The researchers examined relationship status satisfaction, life satisfaction, sexual satisfaction, and the desire for a partner using established scales.
The results found that women reported higher overall well-being, with higher scores in relationship status satisfaction, life satisfaction, sexual satisfaction, and a lower desire for a partner. Single women were happier overall, with better scores even on indices more closely related to relationship status, and these gender differences in results were unique to single individuals. On the other hand, older single men reported lower life and sexual satisfaction than single women and younger single men. A corresponding study by Hill Roy and colleagues (2023) found that older women (aged 48 and above) reported a lower desire for a partner and also higher overall life satisfaction.
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Potential Reasons
The paper discussed one potential reason for the findings aligning with beliefs about heterosexual relationships: in committed relationships between men and women, there are often inequalities that lead to women having more to lose and men reaping more benefits. These inequalities include a lack of priority for women’s sexual pleasure, as well as an uneven distribution of household tasks, leading to a greater burden falling on women. In a traditional context, women used to choose to partner with men for income and financial sustenance. However, as society evolves and as women become more independent, this factor starts to lose its hold. Furthermore, circling back to the study, the lower relationship status satisfaction reported by men could indicate that they stand to gain more from being in a relationship than women.
In today’s world, the career and education opportunities available are creating a space where women can gain financial and mental independence. Women now have the chance to sustain their own lifestyles, grow in their professional settings, and gain freedom from traditional domestic roles. They are able to allocate their time and resources to personal growth and self-discovery, which in turn boosts their self-esteem and confidence, leading to the formation of stronger social support systems. On the other hand, men continue to face societal pressure to earn well enough to be the sole breadwinner in the family and experience stigma and difficulties in forming emotional support systems and healthy relationships. This, accompanied by the current economic conditions and the pressure to live up to the traditional image of masculinity, also contributes to the poorer overall well-being reported by single men.
Power of Female Friendships
Another potential explanation for the results mentioned was the fact that women have stronger social support systems apart from romantic relationships. A response to stress, introduced in a study by Taylor and Klein (2000), is the Tend and Befriend model. This model posits that when faced with a stressful situation, women reach out to create and build a strong social support network that acts as a protective mechanism. During the process of seeking social support, a hormone called oxytocin is released in the brain, which helps in building trust and forming bonds. This hormone also reduces the stress hormone cortisol, helping the individual calm down and regulate their emotions. This can explain why having a strong social support system outside of relationships can help maintain or even improve overall well-being.
Women find comfort in their friendships with other women; they feel a sense of validation and empowerment, as well as a safe space to discuss the shared frustration and anger that women experience due to societal pressures and norms (Ray, 2020). As the book Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close puts it, female friendships follow a Shine Theory, where each individual consciously invests in the friendship and is dedicated to elevating each other rather than competing (Glider, 2022).
As sociocultural and economic landscapes continue to evolve, so too must our societal outlook change. It’s time to stop equating success, desirability, and fulfillment with marital status and to embrace the change as women step out of traditional bounds and gain autonomy.
Citations
Glider, A (2022, August 11). Finding sisterhood: The power of female friendships. Homegrown. https://homegrown.co.in/homegrown-creators/finding-sisterhood-the-power-of-female-friendships
Hoan, E., & MacDonald, G. (2024). “Sisters Are Doin’ It for Themselves”: Gender Differences in Singles’ Well-Being. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 0(0). https://doi.org/10.1177/19485506241287960
Hill Roy L., Park Y., MacDonald G. (2023). Age moderates the link between relationship desire and life satisfaction among singles. Personal Relationships, 30(3), 893–912.https://doi.org/10.1111/pere.12497
Ray, R. (2020). Women’s friendships and feminism. Brandeis University. https://www.brandeis.edu/writing-program/write-now/2020-2021/ray/index.html
Taylor, S. E., Klein, L. C., Lewis, B. P., Gruenewald, T. L., Gurung, R. A., & Updegraff, J. A. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: tend-and-befriend, not fight-or-flight. Psychological review, 107(3), 411–429. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-295x.107.3.411
Times of India. (2024, February 27). 45% of women to be single, childless by 2030: Morgan Stanley study. https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/health-fitness/health-news/45-of-women-to-be-single-childless-by-2030-morgan-stanley-study/articleshow/113192867.cms
Muskan Shah is a Postgraduate Student at Christ University, Bangalore and Moitrayee Das is an assistant professor at FLAME University, Pune.